Ey.
Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2012 9:15 am
Gee.
Why does the name, Lady Justice, make me think of Marvel?
Why does the name, Lady Justice, make me think of Marvel?
SPOLIERJameyoftheMegacosmos wrote: Aya will most certainly have allies. Her first one in magical girl sense is a mentor girl a little like Mami. Though she dies, Aya gets new allies, including her own friends, other magical girls she came across with her mentor, and (SPOLIER!) even her own mother. The cast will come later.
Not sure. Wonder Woman maybe?Garoslaw wrote:Gee.
Why does the name, Lady Justice, make me think of Marvel?
I haven't forgotten about that one. I'm just deciding to set it aside as of now.Armored Entity wrote:Oh, and another thing.
Jamey, are you still working on the Yin-Yang one too, or have you given up on that one? Just curious.
Well, Aya more of just reads a person's mind and messing with a person's body only comes up accidentally at first. But yeah, that does come up in the anime, both in the beginning and later on. Especially when when Aya is out trying to resolve her friends' problems, in which more problems come up or things become worse. And such a power also nearly corrupts her a few times and used against her by the remaining antagonists in the last two parts (Luke Feral, Lucy Feral, David Hathorne, and Mitchel Graves).ShadowSpectre wrote:Tapping into someone's subconscious in that way is slightly more than huge. I like the idea of a mental barrier becoming a physical barrier, but you need to quantify the dangers of messing with someone's mind, realising that subconscious influence is very likely to lead to more negative outcomes as well as positive ones. Magic aside, it is very difficult to change someone's subconscious, that's built up over years and you're suggesting changing it within seconds. I know it's changing "body", but body and mind are irrefutably linked (see: proprioperception and its discussion in: Sherrington, The Integrative Action of the Nervous System and Man on his Nature by the same; Sterman et al. in Annals of Neurology [I forget the page reference, it's in the 300s]; Sacks in The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat, especially chapter 3, "The Disembodied Lady") and while you've alluded that they're linked in such a way with the ability to change the body, whether intentionally or not, you need to make it a little clearer that it's not all happy coincidence and power theft and influence.
How? The way you execute this is critical, because it would threaten to almost overpower your protagonist straight to hell.JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:But yeah, that does come up in the anime, both in the beginning and later on.
Usual, isn't necessarily unique. Wouldn't surprise me, but I recommend that you investigate the possibility of using dilemmas, especially when it comes to choosing how to split one's responsibility and power between two situations that require similar commitments. Food for thought.JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:Especially when when Aya is out trying to resolve her friends' problems, in which more problems come up or things become worse.
Also fairly common a feature, I'd suggest some in-universe discussion concerning the difference between choice and corruption. It is really easy to brand someone corrupt, but what you could do is have the Commanders publicly humiliate Aya and label her as a corrupt, self-centred, selfish and evil figure with her own agenda once you've forced her to make a hard decision in a dilemma.JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:And such a power also nearly corrupts her a few times and used against her by the remaining antagonists in the last two parts (Luke Feral, Lucy Feral, David Hathorne, and Mitchel Graves).
Going to assume you meant barriers between herself and others, not of herself and of other people. You're going to need to make sure you add depth to this kind of interpersonal understanding and development because you risk having a very shallow narrative without more emphasis on the verbal/nonverbal interactions than the physical, actual barriers people put up. Magical girl or not, she's still human and as such victim of the social awkwardness surrounding trying to connect with others.JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:In addition, not only does she have her internal barriers to deal with, but she also unaware of her own problems due to focusing more on just breaking barriers of herself and other people.
I like. Very real, easily possible, very plausible.JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:She doesn't realize that she shouldn't always be selfless and helping others (especially everyone since she often breaks that rule with the AMF and ends up helping people who want to cuase more harm than good) when she has her own problems.
When Aya learns of her mentor's barriers and despairs, she first believes she actually resolved her problems and regrets. But then when she realizes the real nature of her powers, she begins to question whether she actually is solving their problems or unintentionally manipulating people into thinking that way. This especially comes up when she realizes how some of her friends are different then they were before she tapped into their minds, not forgetting about her using this on some of the Commanders. This would then discourage her from using these powers until later on, when she begins fixing her own problems and tears down her own barriers.ShadowSpectre wrote: How? The way you execute this is critical, because it would threaten to almost overpower your protagonist straight to hell.
This is defeinity something that would be shown. Aya is actually not the only one who could tamper with people minds, since her Chinese friend has a similar power of hypnosis when he becomes a magical boy. So maybe there I could show the two characters' different choices on some dialmemas, producing different outcomes.ShadowSpectre wrote:Usual, isn't necessarily unique. Wouldn't surprise me, but I recommend that you investigate the possibility of using dilemmas, especially when it comes to choosing how to split one's responsibility and power between two situations that require similar commitments. Food for thought.
For the difference between choice and corruption, I'd like you discuss and explain on that if you can. This is something that most certainly comes up with the Commanders trying to publicly humiliate Aya and her magical allies in different ways. They would use strategies like the so dialemmas, forcing them into one and using it to humilate them publicly (Ashley, Mitchel, Bud, and David), and other would go more outrageous like fabricating their activities (Bernie, Mitchel), telling the stories from only the AMF's side (Bud, Mitchel), or just being plain assholes (Jaybow, Theseus, and Ashley).ShadowSpectre wrote:Also fairly common a feature, I'd suggest some in-universe discussion concerning the difference between choice and corruption. It is really easy to brand someone corrupt, but what you could do is have the Commanders publicly humiliate Aya and label her as a corrupt, self-centred, selfish and evil figure with her own agenda once you've forced her to make a hard decision in a dilemma.
What I actually meant was breaking barriers between her and the world and those between the world and her friends/allies, whether made by themselves or people like the Commanders. And yes, I would most certainly add depth into this (though I may need help sometimes when doing this). It definitely comes up as Aya and her allies to try to help people break out this, connecting to the external and internal barriers found in the real world.ShadowSpectre wrote: Going to assume you meant barriers between herself and others, not of herself and of other people. You're going to need to make sure you add depth to this kind of interpersonal understanding and development because you risk having a very shallow narrative without more emphasis on the verbal/nonverbal interactions than the physical, actual barriers people put up. Magical girl or not, she's still human and as such victim of the social awkwardness surrounding trying to connect with others.