Universal Lady Justice Aya

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Ey.

Postby Garoslaw » Mon Aug 06, 2012 9:15 am

Gee.
Why does the name, Lady Justice, make me think of Marvel?
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Re: Universal Lady Justice Aya

Postby Dabir » Mon Aug 06, 2012 10:11 am

JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:Aya will most certainly have allies. Her first one in magical girl sense is a mentor girl a little like Mami. Though she dies, Aya gets new allies, including her own friends, other magical girls she came across with her mentor, and (SPOLIER!) even her own mother. The cast will come later.


SPOLIER

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Re: Universal Lady Justice Aya

Postby Armored Entity » Mon Aug 06, 2012 2:33 pm

Oh, and another thing.

Jamey, are you still working on the Yin-Yang one too, or have you given up on that one? Just curious.
I would like to ask a favor from for anyone who is my friend here.
If someday we meet in person in the near future, and I had recently done anything that would confirm that I had become a Brony (which as of now I am not one), such as if I had posted on a Pony-related fan-site, drawn a Pony-themed artwork, contributed to a Pony fanfic, or anything else along those lines. If I have done anything like that, I want you to punch me in the face without warning. This make sound like I'm joking, but I am absolutely serious about this. Ignore any future statements retracting this if I ever make any. Though if you do, please first confirm that it is me who is doing it, and not some Brony who is posing as me and wants to see me get punched. I do not wish to go down the path of the Bronies, and hopefully those of you reading this will help me so that it stays that way, if god forbid I ever even attempt it.
Thank you.

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Universal Lady Justice Aya Anti-Magic Faction

Postby JameyoftheMegacosmos » Mon Aug 06, 2012 3:15 pm

The Anti-Magic Faction (AMF) is the primary organization of antagonists in Universal Lady Justice Aya. Their main job is to hunt down magical girls and any "hope" that's found in the universe. The organization has been active for an unknown but very long amount of time.

The AMF is run by a mysterious yet twisted man and seven commanders, who represent external forces of isolation. Most of it's members rely on the organization's advanced technology, especially "anti-magic" technology to fight magical girls. Though only a few can use magic, they still have the power, technology, and resources to take on magical girls toe-to-toe. In addition, they also have a large influence in the world politically, militarily, economically, and in the media. Because of this power, they antagonize magical girls and cover their activities, often rewriting history into something more "real" to cover the war as well. Most of their bases are also hidden or disguised from the public.

Cast (WARNING! SPOILERS! MAKE SURE YOU REPLY TO THIS IN SPOILERS!):



John Livarre: A recurring antagonist and a high-ranking member of the AMF. His sharpshooting skills, long service, and kill count in magical girls is often respected and as a result, he runs his own section in the AMF. Even if he is assisted by those with magic or anti-magic, he believes technology is still superior.

Commanders

The Commanders of the AMF are the ones in charge of hunting down magical girls and keeping human civilization divided and from progressing too much. Each of the commanders represent a type of external force of isolation. They also have basic weapons and "Capital Weapons", which are large machines they command. They have have certain people who are dependent on them that Aya and her friends must help before defeating and eventually punishing them. In addition, each of the Commanders are also associated with one of the Seven Deadly Sins.














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Re: Ey.

Postby JameyoftheMegacosmos » Mon Aug 06, 2012 9:30 pm

Garoslaw wrote:Gee.
Why does the name, Lady Justice, make me think of Marvel?


Not sure. Wonder Woman maybe?

Armored Entity wrote:Oh, and another thing.

Jamey, are you still working on the Yin-Yang one too, or have you given up on that one? Just curious.


I haven't forgotten about that one. I'm just deciding to set it aside as of now.

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Re: Universal Lady Justice Aya

Postby JameyoftheMegacosmos » Tue Aug 07, 2012 5:57 am

Okay, for my character for Aya Masa.

Aya Masa is about 14-15 years of age who lives in a urban-decay section in a city of Japan. Several years ago, she and her mother, Suzume Masa, were forced to leave their previous home when it was attack by masked armed men. They were able to get out safely, but her father, having no idea what was going on, was killed and their home was destroyed. Ever since then, Suzume had been very protective over Aya, hoping to keep her out of trouble. Because so, Aya has lived a life of isolation and it becomes worse as internal doubts build up within her.

Out in life, Aya has only three known friends, each with their own troubles. One being the best of her friends has love issues, another a Chinese boy expert at the violin who has problems with his father, and a slightly overweight girl with concerns on her health and image. Aya still tries to understand their problems, but is often left confused and powerless. When she becomes magical girl, she uses her powers to understand more about their problems in addition to breaking away from her isolated life. Though she can not exactly solve their problems, she acts a guide and her acts influence her friends to solve them themselves.

Because of isolated life and trouble understanding her friends, Aya often doubts herself when alone and can't fight problems without any kind of assistance. However, she also has a good sense of justice and has a devotion in trying to help everyone with their troubles. This of which influences her decisions in punishing responsible people rather than killing them, even when they are complete monsters or fanatics.

When Aya first became a magical girl, her biggest desire was to help everyone with their troubles and regrets. As part of that wish and her background, her main weapon is a sword. Her powers involve seeing invisible spherical "walls" surrounding people, which she can crack open with her sword to tap into their subconscious. With this power, she could understand a person's problems and tamper with a his/her body, which she usually does to the Commanders. If she taps into a magical girl, she could also gain their outfits and powers, which she could switch to and use until the host magical girl (dead or alive) no longer has regrets and/or problems.

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Re: Universal Lady Justice Aya

Postby ShadowSpectre » Tue Aug 07, 2012 12:25 pm

Tapping into someone's subconscious in that way is slightly more than huge. I like the idea of a mental barrier becoming a physical barrier, but you need to quantify the dangers of messing with someone's mind, realising that subconscious influence is very likely to lead to more negative outcomes as well as positive ones. Magic aside, it is very difficult to change someone's subconscious, that's built up over years and you're suggesting changing it within seconds. I know it's changing "body", but body and mind are irrefutably linked (see: proprioperception and its discussion in: Sherrington, The Integrative Action of the Nervous System and Man on his Nature by the same; Sterman et al. in Annals of Neurology [I forget the page reference, it's in the 300s]; Sacks in The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat, especially chapter 3, "The Disembodied Lady") and while you've alluded that they're linked in such a way with the ability to change the body, whether intentionally or not, you need to make it a little clearer that it's not all happy coincidence and power theft and influence.
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Re: Universal Lady Justice Aya

Postby JameyoftheMegacosmos » Tue Aug 07, 2012 1:57 pm

ShadowSpectre wrote:Tapping into someone's subconscious in that way is slightly more than huge. I like the idea of a mental barrier becoming a physical barrier, but you need to quantify the dangers of messing with someone's mind, realising that subconscious influence is very likely to lead to more negative outcomes as well as positive ones. Magic aside, it is very difficult to change someone's subconscious, that's built up over years and you're suggesting changing it within seconds. I know it's changing "body", but body and mind are irrefutably linked (see: proprioperception and its discussion in: Sherrington, The Integrative Action of the Nervous System and Man on his Nature by the same; Sterman et al. in Annals of Neurology [I forget the page reference, it's in the 300s]; Sacks in The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat, especially chapter 3, "The Disembodied Lady") and while you've alluded that they're linked in such a way with the ability to change the body, whether intentionally or not, you need to make it a little clearer that it's not all happy coincidence and power theft and influence.


Well, Aya more of just reads a person's mind and messing with a person's body only comes up accidentally at first. But yeah, that does come up in the anime, both in the beginning and later on. Especially when when Aya is out trying to resolve her friends' problems, in which more problems come up or things become worse. And such a power also nearly corrupts her a few times and used against her by the remaining antagonists in the last two parts (Luke Feral, Lucy Feral, David Hathorne, and Mitchel Graves).

In addition, not only does she have her internal barriers to deal with, but she also unaware of her own problems due to focusing more on just breaking barriers of herself and other people. She doesn't realize that she shouldn't always be selfless and helping others (especially everyone since she often breaks that rule with the AMF and ends up helping people who want to cuase more harm than good) when she has her own problems. Sounds very like Utena I know, but this and the previous statements do connect.

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Re: Universal Lady Justice Aya

Postby ShadowSpectre » Tue Aug 07, 2012 2:58 pm

JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:But yeah, that does come up in the anime, both in the beginning and later on.

How? The way you execute this is critical, because it would threaten to almost overpower your protagonist straight to hell.

JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:Especially when when Aya is out trying to resolve her friends' problems, in which more problems come up or things become worse.

Usual, isn't necessarily unique. Wouldn't surprise me, but I recommend that you investigate the possibility of using dilemmas, especially when it comes to choosing how to split one's responsibility and power between two situations that require similar commitments. Food for thought.

JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:And such a power also nearly corrupts her a few times and used against her by the remaining antagonists in the last two parts (Luke Feral, Lucy Feral, David Hathorne, and Mitchel Graves).

Also fairly common a feature, I'd suggest some in-universe discussion concerning the difference between choice and corruption. It is really easy to brand someone corrupt, but what you could do is have the Commanders publicly humiliate Aya and label her as a corrupt, self-centred, selfish and evil figure with her own agenda once you've forced her to make a hard decision in a dilemma.

JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:In addition, not only does she have her internal barriers to deal with, but she also unaware of her own problems due to focusing more on just breaking barriers of herself and other people.

Going to assume you meant barriers between herself and others, not of herself and of other people. You're going to need to make sure you add depth to this kind of interpersonal understanding and development because you risk having a very shallow narrative without more emphasis on the verbal/nonverbal interactions than the physical, actual barriers people put up. Magical girl or not, she's still human and as such victim of the social awkwardness surrounding trying to connect with others.

JameyoftheMegacosmos wrote:She doesn't realize that she shouldn't always be selfless and helping others (especially everyone since she often breaks that rule with the AMF and ends up helping people who want to cuase more harm than good) when she has her own problems.

I like. Very real, easily possible, very plausible.
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Re: Universal Lady Justice Aya

Postby JameyoftheMegacosmos » Wed Aug 08, 2012 2:11 am

ShadowSpectre wrote:How? The way you execute this is critical, because it would threaten to almost overpower your protagonist straight to hell.


When Aya learns of her mentor's barriers and despairs, she first believes she actually resolved her problems and regrets. But then when she realizes the real nature of her powers, she begins to question whether she actually is solving their problems or unintentionally manipulating people into thinking that way. This especially comes up when she realizes how some of her friends are different then they were before she tapped into their minds, not forgetting about her using this on some of the Commanders. This would then discourage her from using these powers until later on, when she begins fixing her own problems and tears down her own barriers.

ShadowSpectre wrote:Usual, isn't necessarily unique. Wouldn't surprise me, but I recommend that you investigate the possibility of using dilemmas, especially when it comes to choosing how to split one's responsibility and power between two situations that require similar commitments. Food for thought.


This is defeinity something that would be shown. Aya is actually not the only one who could tamper with people minds, since her Chinese friend has a similar power of hypnosis when he becomes a magical boy. So maybe there I could show the two characters' different choices on some dialmemas, producing different outcomes.

ShadowSpectre wrote:Also fairly common a feature, I'd suggest some in-universe discussion concerning the difference between choice and corruption. It is really easy to brand someone corrupt, but what you could do is have the Commanders publicly humiliate Aya and label her as a corrupt, self-centred, selfish and evil figure with her own agenda once you've forced her to make a hard decision in a dilemma.


For the difference between choice and corruption, I'd like you discuss and explain on that if you can. This is something that most certainly comes up with the Commanders trying to publicly humiliate Aya and her magical allies in different ways. They would use strategies like the so dialemmas, forcing them into one and using it to humilate them publicly (Ashley, Mitchel, Bud, and David), and other would go more outrageous like fabricating their activities (Bernie, Mitchel), telling the stories from only the AMF's side (Bud, Mitchel), or just being plain assholes (Jaybow, Theseus, and Ashley).

ShadowSpectre wrote:Going to assume you meant barriers between herself and others, not of herself and of other people. You're going to need to make sure you add depth to this kind of interpersonal understanding and development because you risk having a very shallow narrative without more emphasis on the verbal/nonverbal interactions than the physical, actual barriers people put up. Magical girl or not, she's still human and as such victim of the social awkwardness surrounding trying to connect with others.


What I actually meant was breaking barriers between her and the world and those between the world and her friends/allies, whether made by themselves or people like the Commanders. And yes, I would most certainly add depth into this (though I may need help sometimes when doing this). It definitely comes up as Aya and her allies to try to help people break out this, connecting to the external and internal barriers found in the real world.

Personal Note: Though it is an influence, but something tells me someone would try to do a crossover between this and Pink Floyd's The Wall. And though I am a fan in crossovers, this kind I have no intention to make and would like people to please not.


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