Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby [][][][] » Sat Jul 21, 2012 2:53 am

Anyways, still awaiting Garo's side of the story.
Also, I'm not really all that interested; that was just information gleaned from scouting web pages.
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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby Dabir » Sat Jul 21, 2012 10:50 am

Actually I think SS did misspell practice. 'Practice' is doing something over and over again to get better at it, 'practise' is doing something with dedication, like being a practising Jew or a practising doctor, who does practice but also has a practise.

God damn it.

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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby Aquamancia » Sat Jul 21, 2012 1:50 pm

Dabir wrote:Actually I think SS did misspell practice. 'Practice' is doing something over and over again to get better at it, 'practise' is doing something with dedication, like being a practising Jew or a practising doctor, who does practice but also has a practise.

God damn it.


I noticed this after I made my previous post. I couldn't be bothered to edit it.

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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby ShadowSpectre » Sun Jul 22, 2012 9:49 am

my bad
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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby ShadowSpectre » Sun Jul 22, 2012 10:00 am

sorry for double posting but this is important
Armored Entity wrote:Also I do understand you aren't into Madoka Magika, but I guess you like the idea behind this fan-series, am I right?

NO, NO, NO. I am of the opinion that this is better than what you usually do; take it from me, Meta, that really isn't saying much. I am willing to give you a chance because I am feeling nice, but I don't really care for the idea.
Armored Entity wrote:Also what exactly do you mean by "concepts and lore?"

I mean the ideas of the contracts with the Devil, the references to Faust, the shades of grey of morality, the balance of desire and requirement and that you need to be careful about what you wish for. (AlexMdle gave me a crash course)

... I see none of that in this. It could be decently written without those, but it does fuck all for being a good fanfic. It's like doing a cinematographic interpretation of the Hulk without actually accessing the struggles between anger and calm, making Spiderman without Peter Parker being involved. It could be artistically good but it's functionally useless.
Armored Entity wrote:Also I did talk about it with Alexmdle. I was surprised, but he actually doesn't like the idea of this.

That's because YOU COMPLETELY IGNORE THE CONCEPTS AND LORE. There is NOTHING in this that actually works with the overture of the series
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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby ShadowSpectre » Sun Jul 22, 2012 10:02 am

sorry for triple posting but
Armored Entity wrote:Oh, didn't know that's how it is spelled in British.

ENGLISH, MOTHERFUCKER, DO YOU SPEAK IT
BRITISH IS NOT A LANGUAGE
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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby [][][][] » Sun Jul 22, 2012 10:42 am

Okay, two versions.
American English and British English.
Given that ShadowSpectre is British...

Oh, and American English modified spellings of some words from their British counterpart.
Like armour -> armor, colour -> color, and such.
Sorry for being Captain Obvious here.
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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby Armored Entity » Sat Aug 11, 2012 9:46 pm

Well I'm getting progress done on this little by little. I talked with some other people on some other sites, and many of them think this is going to be great when its done. However, they've made some suggestions that I'm going to add.
Here's a few of the changes I am making now.

-I had another part that I was going to add to the reason why Jo supports Kyubey and is happy that she made a contract, rather than unhappy. Not only does she think she is doing more of a good since she's helping Kyubey preserve the universe. She also notices that the Evil Witches are very unhappy in their Witch Barriers for various reasons. So Jo thinks that it is now her duty to destroy the Witches so that she can finally put them out of their misery. I figured this will make Jo have more reason behind her efforts, and it also is rather dark, as for euthanasia isn't a very happy subject.

-This is another idea I had for something cute that Jo will do at times using her "body disassembly and reassembly" trick, which Jo performs through abuse of the Semi-Immortality provided by her Soul Gem, and through custom-made brackets she installed in-between spaces of her body.
At times, usually during the scenes where the Maho Shoujos and Rika are just chatting with one another, Jo will remove her head and allow someone she really trusts to carry it around, while the rest of her does other things, although making sure she stays within the range of her Soul Gem. Sometimes, she'll even let them pop it off by themselves instead of removing it on her own. The characters she trusts most are Rika and Mami, and she will do that most often with them, and she does it usually to allow them to cuddle her or play around with her. In fact, I had this one scene planned where Rika is carrying Jo's head around while the rest of her body goes about doing some other tasks nearby. While she is, Jo then tells Rika "You've been carrying me around for almost an hour now, you know you'll have to stick me back on sooner or later." Then Rika replies to her, "I know, but you're just so darn cute!" and then Rika pets her, which Jo enjoys. Someone else suggested this, and I figured it would be cute.

-Another idea I had was after meeting her, and since her parents are out for the weekend, Rika decides to sleep over at Jo's motel room. There is space in there for Rika to sleep in, and she decides to spend the night with her there. During that part, she learns more about Jo, like Jo tells her about her life before she made a contract, how she thinks of her life now, and much more, which adds to the character development. Later on, during this sleepover, Rika gets a surprise visit from Kyubey at this part, and Kyubey as usual, tries to get her to make a contract.

-I had some ideas for funny puns and jokes that they will make at certain parts of this Manga. The original Maho Shoujo Madoka Magika didn't have too many of these, and I figured it would be nice to add. I know the puns don't make it automatically good, but it sort of spices things up if you know what I mean. Here's a few example of the jokes I had in mind. I personally thought these were rather witty, and sort of humorous too, though not that much.
In one scene during the battle with Glacia, the Winter Witch, Jo tries her one special attack on Glacia. This attack involves pulling her head off, charging it with Elemental Energy (fire in this case since fire hurts Glacia more), and then throwing it at her like a cannonball. After succeeding in wounding Glacia with this attack, Kyouko quickly retrives Jo's head from where it landed. Kyouko then makes a joke here and says "I always loved that move of yours Jo, you really are, using your head, there!" Then Jo responds by saying "More like losing, and using my head, hehehe."
Another pun was going to be when Jo is showing off more of her body disassembly trick to Rika. In this one, Jo detaches her hand at the wrist, then makes it crawl on top of Rika and pets her with it. Rika notices and tell her "Wow, I can see how this special ability often times comes in, hand-y, for you Jo!"
And another pun, not having to do with Jo in this one, will be at the part where they are engaged in battle with Kolour, the Puppet Witch. During the fight, Homura tells Rika "Okay, I've got a plan to really do some damage to Kolour." Rika then asks, "really, what is your plan then?" Following that, Homura spawns a bunch of C4 charges with her abilities, which they are going to use on Kolour, and tells Rika, "well why don't you, C4, Yourself!" (Get it, because C4 sounds like, "See for" and such).


I plan to incorporate these changes into it, as for they actually would work very good in it. Also I have drawn some stuff for it, but I still think it will be a while till I can release anything. Maybe later on, I'll post some character references of some of the fan-characters in this, so you can see what they will look like.
Last edited by Armored Entity on Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:04 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby ShadowSpectre » Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:03 pm

Armored Entity wrote:I talked with some other people on some other sites, and many of them think this is going to be great when its done.

A lot of things affect being "great". What the people on these other are like and how old they are, for instance.
Armored Entity wrote:. So Jo thinks that it is now her duty to destroy the Witches so that she can finally put them out of their misery. I figured this will make Jo have more reason behind her efforts, and it also is rather dark, as for euthanasia isn't a very happy subject.

Are you fucking kidding me? You're going to have Jo, who has no reason whatsoever to believe that the witches are unhappy with what they have, think what she's doing is mercy killing? Find better motives.
Armored Entity wrote:This is another idea I had for something cute that Jo will do... -snip- Jo will remove her head and allow someone she really trusts to carry it around... -snip- she'll even let them pop it off by themselves... -snip- she does this usually to allow them to cuddle her or play around with her... -snip- Jo then tells Rika "You've been carrying me around for almost an hour now, you know you'll have to stick me back on sooner or later." Then Rika replies to her, "I know, but you're just so darn cute!" and then Rika pets her, which Jo enjoys. Someone else suggested this, and I figured it would be cute.

NO. THIS IS NOT CUTE. THIS IS WEIRD. THIS IS FUCKING STUPID. CASUAL DISMEMBERMENT IS NOT. FUCKING. CUTE.
Armored Entity wrote:I had some ideas for funny puns and jokes that they will make at certain parts of this Manga... -snips- I know the puns don't make it automatically good, but it sort of spices things up if you know what I mean.

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No, we don't know. You don't talk about "spicing it up". You're being a goddamn moron. THIS IS NOT HOW YOU DO HUMOUR.
Armored Entity wrote:Here's a few example of the jokes I had in mind.

THIS IS NOT HOW YOU PREPARE HUMOUR.
Armored Entity wrote:I personally thought these were rather witty, and sort of humorous too, though not that much.

THIS IS NOT HOW YOU JUDGE HUMOUR.
Armored Entity wrote:. Kyouko then makes a joke here and says "I always loved that move of yours Jo, you really are, using your head, there!" Then Jo responds by saying "More like losing, and using my head, hehehe."

... are you fucking twelve? You're lampshade-hanging *badly*. I didn't even realise it was possible to be this bad at written humour.
Armored Entity wrote:Another pun was going to be when Jo is showing off more of her body disassembly trick to Rika. In this one, Jo detaches her hand at the wrist, then makes it crawl on top of Rika and pets her with it. Rika notices and tell her "Wow, I can see how this special ability often times comes in, hand-y, for you Jo!"

That's not how you do puns.
Armored Entity wrote:And another pun, not having to do with Jo in this one, will be at the part where they are engaged in battle with Kolour, the Puppet Witch. During the fight, Homura tells Rika "Okay, I've got a plan to really do some damage to Kolour." Rika then asks, "really, what is your plan then?" Following that, Homura spawns

SATAN
Armored Entity wrote:a bunch of C4 charges with her abilities, which they are going to use on Kolour, and tells Rika, "well why don't you, C4, Yourself!" (Get it, because C4 sounds like, "See for" and such).

Fuck you. I take offence at this. You're assuming our humour is at least as bad, if not worse, than yours.

Armored Entity wrote:I plan to incorporate these changes into it, as for they actually would work very good in it.

That isn't a sentence. Also as for making this better, it won't. There, opinion given. Fuck.
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Re: Madoka Magika Fan-manga project of mine

Postby Armored Entity » Sun Aug 12, 2012 3:18 am

ShadowSpectre wrote:Are you fucking kidding me? You're going to have Jo, who has no reason whatsoever to believe that the witches are unhappy with what they have, think what she's doing is mercy killing? Find better motives.


Actually she does have reason to believe that it is mercy killing. You wouldn't know this since you do not watch Maho Shoujo Madoka Magika, but the Evil Witches in it are always unhappy as they do their various evil things. Like for example, Oktavia, as she resided in her wierd theater, constantly felt depressed about her lover whom she can never have, and the other Witches had similar problems. So she does have a reason to believe that she is mercy killing.

And also as I stated before, the other reason why Jo is happy that she made a Contract with Kyubey and not regretting it, is because she enjoys all the thrills and excitement and adventure she experiences when she goes into the Witch Barriers and confronts the Evil Witches. She's adventurous and loves to go through all that, even though she knows the danger.
Its kind of like how in Sonic X, Sonic actually would enjoy breaking into Eggman's bases and scrapping all his robots, despite risking getting killed as he does it. Because all the adventure and thrill of it is enjoyable to him. Similar concept was used in many other series I've watched. I figure this makes Jo unique from all the other Maho Shoujos, because the other Maho Shoujos in the series regret ever making a contract with Kyubey and find it to be a burden. Jo however, finds it to be awesome and she thinks it was the best decision she's made because of that, and many other reasons. She looks to the bright side of the Contract, and focuses on that.

ShadowSpectre wrote:NO. THIS IS NOT CUTE. THIS IS WEIRD. THIS IS FUCKING STUPID. CASUAL DISMEMBERMENT IS NOT. FUCKING. CUTE.


Actually it can be. It depends on the context that it is in. And here it is not only cute, but funny too. Like while Jo does this to herself with those she trusts, often times they do things with her such as snuggle her up, pet her lightly, toss her around like she's a ball, poke her cheeks, and such. Its just the way she does it and the method of which it is happening that makes it cute and funny.

And I can give you plenty of other examples of how this Semi-Immortal casual dismemberment can be both cute and funny. Have you ever seen the series, My Life As a Teenage Robot? In that series, Jenny (or XJ9) would often times dismember herself around her allies, taking advantage of this, being one of her unique abilities, and even often times making her allies such as Brad and Sheldon jealous of her due to her having this ability but they don't. And the way she would do it would often times be funny, and even cute at times too.

Or here's another example. Check this out, and see another way this concept of casual immortal dismemberment can be cute and funny.


For Jo, its pretty much the same reason why it is different. Its the way it happens and the context it is in that makes it cute and funny.

And that's not the only way she uses them. As I explained in previous posts here, Jo in this series also uses this special skill of her's in combat, and in other situations too. Read that post to see how Jo in this series takes advantage of this skill.

This is another one of the many aspects about her that makes her different from all the other Maho Shoujos. In Maho Shoujo Madoka Magika, the Maho Shoujos all have this ability that they cannot die or feel pain as long as their Soul Gem is not destroyed, and they can also survive even fatal wounds as a result. The other Maho Shoujo's merely just used this to survive more harm in battle and last longer against Witches, although they could take it farther if they wanted to, but they just choose not to.
Jo however is unique in that she takes this to the next level. She uses this Semi-Immortality in conjunction with custom metal brackets she installed between spaces of her body, to detach her limbs at will and make herself fall apart (not always completely), then have her limbs operate individually, and then just pull herself back together when she's done. After all, if cutting her into pieces will no longer kill her (only destruction of her Soul Gem will), then why not make the most of it?

This is the reason why I use the term, "Semi-Immortal," with them, and not "Immortal." Immortal would mean that there would be no way to kill them period. For the Maho Shoujo's, they cannot be killed from fatal wounds and decapitation and such, but take out their Soul Gem and its curtains for them. So they're almost Immortal, but not completely.

ShadowSpectre wrote:No, we don't know. You don't talk about "spicing it up". You're being a goddamn moron. THIS IS NOT HOW YOU DO HUMOUR.


Okay, here I totally agree with you. If I am going to add a few small puns and jokes here and there, I guess I'll have to make funnier ones. I'll ask my friends and others for ideas and advice on making them funnier. I'll get to you another time with that.


Personally though, I think one of your problems is that you are not familiar with Maho Shoujo Madoka Magika and have not seen the series enough to understand it. Maybe if you did, you'd understand all of this and the reasons behind it better.
I would like to ask a favor from for anyone who is my friend here.
If someday we meet in person in the near future, and I had recently done anything that would confirm that I had become a Brony (which as of now I am not one), such as if I had posted on a Pony-related fan-site, drawn a Pony-themed artwork, contributed to a Pony fanfic, or anything else along those lines. If I have done anything like that, I want you to punch me in the face without warning. This make sound like I'm joking, but I am absolutely serious about this. Ignore any future statements retracting this if I ever make any. Though if you do, please first confirm that it is me who is doing it, and not some Brony who is posing as me and wants to see me get punched. I do not wish to go down the path of the Bronies, and hopefully those of you reading this will help me so that it stays that way, if god forbid I ever even attempt it.
Thank you.

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